This blog is not intended to provide legal advice, legal services or legal anything else. Don't sue me. All I have is debt anyway.

Thursday, October 13, 2011

Decisions and Sentiment

So, I broke the news to Cora's preschool today that she would be leaving (sometime) at the end of the year. As to when, we're still hashing that one out. I tend to get all emotional and shit when I talk about it. It makes me sad. It's kind of ridiculous, considering I am not the touchy-feely one in this household. But I'm sad that Cora will be leaving her friends. And I'm sad that Violette won't be going there at all. I'm sure the new school will be fine, but that's all it will be is "fine." I like the place she's going now, and I think they do a great job with her. Of course, if she were starting kindergarten next year, then I could convince Husband she should stay, but she won't start until 2013. Sucks.

I feel bad she's leaving her friends. She is quite the social butterfly apparently. Hopefully that means she'll adapt well, and make new friends, being the new kid in school. I've never had to do that, so I don't know how that is. I went to school with all of the same people, from kindergarten to graduation, I was never "the new kid." Most of the people I went to high school with stayed in the area and went to the University. Even in grad school, I already knew people (two of which I went to high school with), and in law school, several of my grad school classmates were there and even one from undergrad. Husband, on the other hand, was an Army brat, so he was always the new kid. After high school, he moved two hours away and came here, instead of going to the university closer to his home. So, it's really not a big deal to him for her to change schools.

I've been talking to her about it, but I'm not sure she understands, even though we took a tour of the school. I tell her she'll be going to a new school, and her friends won't be there. She'll need to make new friends. She'll have a new teacher. I think she fully understands though. She told me that she'll be going to a new school because she's big and Violette will be going to her old school because she's small. So, she sort of gets it (even though Vee will be going to her new school eventually).

Oh well. And of course over the next year we have to figure out where she'll be going to elementary school. If we don't win the lottery for the Spanish immersion program in the public school, which is our first choice, then we have to decide if we want to send her to Catholic school. Our parish has a really awesome school K-8, and it's cheaper than we'll be paying for preschool even at the new place. But I'm not sure about sending her off to be indoctrinated. We're Catholic, but we're not *that* Catholic. Depending on who you ask, we aren't even Catholic at all, being all pro-gay and pro-choice and whatnot. So, I don't want my precious little snowflake coming back and being all "gay sex makes the baby Jesus cry" and asking why Mommy likes killing babies or whatthefuckever nonsense that gravely offends me. I want to make sure "Catholic education" doesn't equate "Catholic indoctrination of conservative politics."

And of course, the annoying thing about the Spanish immersion program is that they don't take sibling priority, so if Cora gets in, Vee might not, or vice versa. I guess it won't be terrible for the girls not to be in the same school system, but it's kind of weird. And a bit inconvenient. Even with one in middle school and the other in elementary school, it's usually still the same school system, same school board, etc. Oh well. The other option is to stay in the district we're in and send them to the elementary school across the street from the house. Which wouldn't be that bad, although the elementary school is okay, not one of the best in the city, but not terrible. Certainly would be convenient! And the middle school and high school are much better than the elementary school we're districted in, too, two of the best in the city. So we could always send them to Catholic elementary and put them in public school later on.

This education stuff is hard. I guess we're just lucky to have too many choices. Considering I'm driving out to BFE on Monday to sit in on a meeting with a principal, some teachers and the parent of a kid who was recently diagnosed with diabetes and whose school has failed to make accommodations for her and won't let her attend when the school nurse isn't there to give the insulin shots. (That's a big no-no.) And that's why small town living ain't for me -- lack of opportunity, lack of resources.


E.H. said...

OMG, yes. I know. When I pulled Pea out of her first daycare, even though she hated it and the woman who ran it was batshit crazy (her teachers were good, but still), I sobbed. (She, however, was more than elated to not have to go back and for months would wake up and exclaim, "No school today!") Now, I'm not particularly thrilled with her school -- it's just OK -- but the looming deadline of "job or no school until kindergarten" has me FREAKED OUT. And I will still cry if she leaves this place, even though it's only meh.

There are several schools I'll put her in the lottery for, but at least her local public school is still the best K-5 around. I drove her past it the other day, just to show her (it is a big, old, beautiful school and campus) and she was a little intimidated.

I went to seven public schools growing up and my husband went to thirteen. We both hated being the new kid, but at this age, I don't think it matters much at all. Sixth grade, sure. But not 3 or 4.

Hanah said...

I don't think it's too weird to have your kids in different school systems from each other. For example, my aunt sent her daughter to a private school for high school because she was very social and prone to get distracted in a school environment that didn't take academics super-seriously. Her son was more level-headed, so he stayed in public school throughout and did just fine. But cross that bridge when you come to it.

As regards your values and the Catholic school, a friend of mine with two elementary-age kids gave me this very sage advice: The best conversations about your family's values come in response to coming in contact with values you don't share. So you shouldn't worry about your kids being exposed to values you dislike, as long as you are aware of the exposure and take the time to discuss it with them fully.

Proto Attorney said...

Hanah, that's a very good point. Also, I live in the state that gave us the Creation Museum, so it's not like religious conservatism will be a foreign concept in the lives of my children anyway.

Yeah, I'm overthinking it, but the idea she's leaving her friends just makes me so sad. In reality, she probably couldn't give a shit less.