This blog is not intended to provide legal advice, legal services or legal anything else. Don't sue me. All I have is debt anyway.

Wednesday, September 16, 2009

Making New Friends

I might be a little pathetic. I'm at the point where my boss's wife is calling people up and asking them to be my friend. I feel sad for myself in a profound way.

The result being, I have a blind lunch date next week with a woman my age, who is in the financial industry, and has an infant. She sounds really nice, and I hope she likes me so I can have a friend. Isn't that sad? It's like being one of those desperate single people that absolutely cannot stand being single, so they latch on to whomever throws them any crumb of attention as they ooze desperation. Love me! she cries. That's me. I'm friendless, I ooze desperation and I'm looking for crumbs of attention. I also finally managed to chat with my upstairs neighbor. We both seem to have the same type of schedule: when we're not working, we get the hell out of town. So, she told me her work schedule for next week and we'll try to get together Wednesday evening and go see a movie or something. We were both lamenting how sad it was going to see a movie by yourself -- and being the only one in the entire theatre. That is sad. I saw Julie & Julia a couple weeks ago, and I was the only one there. She had the same experience with Time Traveler's Wife. I guess we're the only two young women in town who go to 9pm showings of chick flicks.

Anyway, I'm a very social person and I usually make friends very easily, so this whole no-friend-thing is bewildering to me. I know I've only been here a month, but figuring out how to meet people [I actually want to spend time with] is difficult. I suspect that the majority of people my age and with my interests will be nurses over at the hospital we sue. (Like my upstairs neighbor.) My blind lunch date directed me to a local young professionals association, although she said it's mostly CPA's, but I've joined anyway. There's not really a local young lawyers association. (If there is, I think it's me and one other dude.) A friend of mine suggested Meetup.com, but the only two groups here include one dedicated to electing a Republican to Congress (FAIL) and the other is Paranormal Believers. (I might be an overly-devoted and slightly-obsessive X-Files fan, but even I'm not that nutters.) And apparently one of my law school classmates is in town working for the police in some capacity; however, he was rather obnoxious in class and is overly-devoted to wearing track suits, so I'm going to pass on giving him a call.

But I need to make friends soon. Lunch by myself sucks. Dinner by myself sucks even more. I had cereal tonight for dinner and watched the rest of Season 1 of Dexter. High fiber cereal and serial killers. Super fun. I'm thinking of getting a few dozen cats to seal the deal.


Cee said...

I feel the same way! I'm desperate for friends too!! At this point, I'll take anyone! The hippy girl who breathes through her nose while she snacks during class is even tempting me at this point!

To bad we weren't in the same state- I'd be your friend (p.s.- you are way cooler than the loud nose breather)

LL said...

I was just going to say the same as Cee- I feel the same way much of the time and I wish we were all in the same state. I've always made friends easily and have an amazing group of law school friends scattered across the US but I don't have any close friends at the firm. This would be fine, but the other girls in my class are just the bestest of friends and I'm totally, purposefully kept outside of it. A senior associate commented that the girls in my class year seem like they could be on Mean Girls, which is completely accurate. And it sucks to be the one they randomly decided to exclude. I don't even think I like them, and they're not in my section so it doesn't matter much, but it sucks to be left out. I've never been on the outside and it seems even more unfair when I'm always the person who has looked for the girl/guy on the outside and brought them in.

At least the other senior attorneys seem to think they're catty. I eat almost exclusively with partners and senior associates, whom I genuinely like and maybe it will serve me better in the end anyway. Bleh. I still think we need to have a MILP reunion (is it a reunion if you've never met?) one day.

LEO said...

ditto ditto.

But really, I think it's much sadder to remain lonely and friendless than it is to shamelessly put yourself out there and hope to make a friend or two. And after college/grad school, it's really hard to meet people. Just ask my husband who moved out to CA with me and worked from home. So anyway, have a great blind date...I hope she's everything you dream of in a lady friend (heheheh)

Melissa said...

In my first office, I was in a very rural part of the State where I didn't know ANYONE. My husband only lived with me a few days a week so it was sink or swim. I went to the local bar and met people that way. Also, you end up making friends with the people that you work with.